When I took occupancy of the Knoxville House, which we have nick-named The Wallow, it had not been mowed in at least a year. The weeds were, if not quite epic, certainly epic-lite.

The property’s riding mower was purchased with the property. It’s a little 14-HP, 40″ blade Murray. Suffice it to say, it was not designed for this level of bush-hogging. That’s not to say that it didn’t step up. Oh, it was slow going, but eventually, I mowed the whole damn yard. The mower’s blade looks like shit, but the job got done.

One of the most prolific plants in the yard was poke. Poke is recognizable by its red stems. It grows clusters of red berries, which, like many wild red berries, are poisonous to humans. In fact, most parts of the poke plant are poisonous, with the root being the most poisonous (even deadly) and the berries being the least. However, you can eat the young leaves when the plant is very small if you boil them in multiple changes of water. Not sure why you’d want to, but I guess it’s easier to grow than spinach or lettuce.

And boy, does it grow!

This poke plant has actually fallen over it has grown so tall. After I mowed, poke plants had put out new leaves in just a few days. That led me to an interesting survival strategy if you’re ever stranded in the wilderness. See, very young poke leaves are edible, but the plant can be hard to identify before the stems get their red color, by which time, it’s poisonous and you shouldn’t eat it. So instead of going to the effort of finding young poke plants, you should just find an adult, cut it off at the root, and come back in a few days. The root will have put out many little leaves for you to eat, if you didn’ die in the meantime.

That’s me with a machete, about to do battle with the poke.

BATTLE!

It was no match for me. Unfortunately, it has many relatives, scattered all over the land. I sure wish there was something it was good for to me.